Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Pesky Expectations!

Think back to the three best moments in your life. Think back to the three worst moments in your life. Remember them well, and realize that all six of those events occurred because of your perspective. While events may naturally be exciting and/or demoralizing, I am firmly convinced that the impact is because of what we thought would happen going into it.

Expectations have much to do with how we react to a situation. For example, objectively, someone could sit back and say LeBron James's first year in Miami was a fantastic success. Forgetting the fact that Cleveland fell apart, showing his value, you have a team that was excellent all year, made it to the NBA Finals, and probably should have won, just as Dallas should have beaten Miami years earlier. Similarly, many a parent is frustrated when their adult daughter gets married to someone she loves.

In both cases, the disappointment is because we came in with pre-conceived notions. But this can work the other way also. My son took a test over a book that he read months ago and Kelly and I are confident he didn't know anything about it. He did poorly, and we were frustrated. Then we looked at the facts and found that his taking the test finished his requirement for the year and he did well. We were elated, but only because we expected this test to kill his average.

It's crazy how our thoughts of things beforehand can totally change how we feel about something. Last night there were primaries. We had people getting less than 20% of the vote in Arizona claiming success. Expectations colored their view of success.

Now why would anyone care enough to talk about this? Well recently, I have had things where people are curious why I am not ecstatic to which my only reply was I expected it. Similarly, I've had issues where people are wondering how I am remotely cheery, and again, my expectations led me to it.

I've heard it said that there are optimists, realists, and pessimists. I don't know if those are the only three categories, but I do know that the mind is a powerful tool that can affect our emotions merely by believing something before it happens. So watch your thoughts as they become expectations. Of course that leads to the flip side of the same coin. Do not let your expectations drive you so much that you're unpleasant to be around.

Now walking this edge may be something that you find simple, but I find the only time I can control my expectations are when I let them control me, and that isn't good for anyone. So, as I struggle through controlling my expectations and still being moderately enjoyable to be around, I hope that I am able to do so. When I was young, I didn't care, I was always hopeful. Now that I've grown, I hope that I am not so staunchly pessimistic as to be loathsome to be around!

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Who are you When Life is Tougher Than You Thought?

It is just unavoidable in life where you will show up to something and just be taken completely by surprise. Hopefully it doesn't happen often, but no matter how much you try to prepare yourself for some situations, the inevitable feeling of surprise will occasionally hit you. Now this has happened to me recently, and I have determined that the way you react to this unexpected situation tells a lot about who you are.

I ran into a situation several months ago, where a friend and I attended a meeting. The people we were meeting took one look at us and tried to leave. They wanted to retreat right away. To me, this is almost always unacceptable. You show up and don't like what you see, it is cowardice to leave.

Another response is to fret and see if you can achieve what you originally intended. If the surprise took you off guard, your reaction is to do what you can to create the situation you were hoping for. If it is a competition, you attempt to achieve the hoped-for result on a technicality. If it is a meeting, you attempt to have certain factors disposed of. If it is a debate, you attempt to turn it back into a speech.

Finally, I feel the appropriate response, is to do the best you can and live with the results. Recently, I went somewhere with five young people, whom I am honored to call friends. They were totally surprised by something that happened when we arrived that totally altered what we came there to do. They did the best they could with the hand they were dealt, achieved more success than anyone thought they could and achieved a whole lot of respect in my eyes. We were all depressed that it ended up being something different than we thought it would be, but I was very proud of them.

Life is a series of surprising events, to one degree or another. When you face an adversity different than you thought, but you give everything you've got to make it work, that is incalculable greatness. And I hope that when I am backed up again, I can learn from my friends and perform as well as can be expected for my situation!

Friday, February 24, 2012

Women are just Better!

So the girls (Emily and Julia) were up all night sick. I watched nice little kid cartoons with them, which as we all know is pretty simple work. On the other hand, Kelly was a trooper, who cleaned everything up, got them the necessary equipment and food to feel better. This got me to thinking, "Why are men and children so helpless when they are sick or when someone else is sick?"

When men are sick they mope around as if the world is coming to an end. We are useless (more useless than we normally are) as we don't help out or do anything else. We want someone else to take care of us, make us soup, hand us the TV remote, and adjust our blanket. We want someone to cater to our every whim.

In that regard, men just don't mature. Children are similarly challenged when they are sick, and while it seems natural for the wee ones to be helpless, there is just something about the extra helplessness of being sick that just makes it seem like extra work. Making them bathe is extra work, as is getting them to do menial things like walk to the table. So, children are also seemingly worthless while sick.

While the rest of us become worthless to society while we are sick, the worst part is probably that we also refuse to help others who are sick. While I certainly feel sympathy for my children when they are less than 100%, the odds of my doing anything extra (and considering the light workload I pull in comparison to my wife, there is a lot of room for extra work) are seemingly zero. And while children may say, "I'm sorry mommy" or "I'm sorry daddy," there is just no way that they are going to be helpful.

This is where I must take pause and just marvel at women. I first noticed this when growing up, as my mom would cater to my every whim, even if she were just as sick as I was. As I grew a little older and was allowed to stay home alone with just my cousin Bek and my sister Jenni, the two of them, who were much closer to being a woman than I was, would take care of things.

And finally, I marvel at my wife Kelly, who despite the fact that she's probably as sick as any of us when it happens will take care of us, get us soup, and just make sure our lives are as comfortable as can be. I guess I'm just in awe that people can call women weaker, when it is clear that they can put up with a lot more and perform better.

God clearly knew what he was doing when he gave man a help-mate. The family unit seems to have this perfectly functioning situation, and despite women around the world wanting we men to help, I think they know that we just aren't as good at it. While I wish I were better at performing with or around sickness, I couldn't be happier that I have the perfect companion as a gift from God! Kelly is amazing!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Which type of person are you?

There are many different types of people in this world and to attempt to categorize them into a number small enough to fit on a blog is impossible, but I want to talk about a few differences I've noticed.

First, there is painfully early guy, on time guy, and late guy. Unfortunately, I camp out in the late category. I annoy many a person with the fact that I cannot seem to be on time with things. This is definitely something I want to work on, as I think it is a bad representation of both me and my training, and I know better. While I would like to be on time, I find the obscenely early guy even more annoying than the late guy. There people will meet you at your hotel at four am when your flight leaves at around eight. I don't need to be running to the gate, but sitting at the gate three hours early irks me just as much.

The second way people can be grouped is by patience. Granted, some of a perspective on patience is driven by the time category, but all things being equal, there are people who are just too patient. They are "patient" to the extent that they allow people to walk all over them. This is not good and needs to be corrected, before they get trampled in this cold, hard world. On the other hand, the people with on patience are equally annoying. These people try to take your plate while you're still eating or yell when things take one more minute than promised. They hit the elevator button multiple times. We're all waiting on certain things in life, and thes people just don't get it. To some degree, I think it is that they are too selfish to consider the plight of those around you. While I have traces of this in my life, I feel I have begun to conquer this demon with God's help.

Third, people can be sorted based on their consideration of the person next to them. Some people try to take up extra space and not allow anyone to sit (or even park, I guess) next to them. While others will purposefully make themselves small to allow for the person next to him to stretch out. Sitting (or parking) next to the former is a pain, while the latter is a joy.

Now, I only bring these up because I am at the airport and on an airplane whilst putting this together, and while I have improvements to make in these areas, I have had to deal with people from all these extremes. And instead of complaining or comparing, I decided to write and see if anyone else had experienced any of these type of people and had a funny anecdote to share. Have fun!

Monday, February 20, 2012

Struggling, but Encouraged

When I was young, I, like all other little kids, didn't need to be taught to do the wrong thing. It came naturally to me. I did many stupid things as a child, to which I am sure my mother, father, and sister would attest.

Something happened along the way, however, and I began to show vestiges of being a new creature. This is the person that is occasionally likable. And when I am so, it is the work of Christ in me that you notice. I am so blessed to have been able to be used by God for years, and I hope to consistently walk worthy of that calling.

While I'd love to be that guy all the time, occasionally, I still fall far short of what I desire and Christ would have for me to do. There have been moments where I think that I am in good company. However, while I can take solace in the fact that the Apostle Paul was likewise falling short, I don't ever want that to be an excuse for me. I need to take ownership when I make a mistake.

So, while it is still this journey of life through which I am muddling, I guarantee that there will be days where I shake my head as I do something generally stupid. Hopefully, I will be challenged to fix it and then I will do the same thing as the apostle Paul. I will confess and conclude, "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus."

Now that you realize I am not perfect, I hope that you will treat me with gentleness and care when I make one of these bone-headed decisions. Recently this happened, and I had a couple friends who were so gracious to me in their exemplification of the Lord by correcting me with grace and truth, that I am all the more thankful for them.

So, as determined as I am to be perfect, I know that I will fail, but I am thankful that not only does God work through the things where it is easy to see him, but He sharpens me with the bad ones and gives me people who invest in my life, and that is something that I can always cherish!

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Are you comfortable?

Comfort. We define it in different ways. We seek it in different elements. We may want it from our food. We definitely want it in our relationships. We seek to make it an element in making our house a home. We read about different ways to achieve it. We may even seek it from our clothes. But, ultimately, what is it?

Is comfort something that we should attempt to achieve? Is comfort a beneficial thing by any means? Does comfort lead to anything? Is comfort an acceptable end, no matter the means?

On a personal note, comfort is what I've spent the last few years attempting to attain. Aside from the occassional frustrating day or two, comfort is something I've treated like a desirable conclusion. As I strive ever the more to live a life of comfort, I sit on the edge of proverbial seat of life hoping that nothing upsets the delicate balance so that I might fall out of the seat in an uncomfortable way.

Here I stand. As I look through the human history of which I am aware, noone ever accomplished something great by maintaining comfort. Comfort never led to anything other than complacency. I am reminded of one of my favorite quotes, A ship in the harbor is safe, but that is not what ships were built for. And while I am forever wanting to improve, occassionally, I need a messenger to give me a nudge in the right direction.

In my life, God has blessed me with many good friends, and recently one of them gave me such a nudge. I had become very comfortable in my life, and I need to strive for improvement, despite my belief that contentment is important. While I fear the pain that change may bring, I fear more the pain of not being obedient or worthy of my call.

So, if you know me, and you see me striving harder on something that you thought I had let become something that I just did not strive for hard enough previously, it probably means a friend has given me a nudge. As one who is thankful for these nudges, maybe if you see me failing in a given area, you, too, will give me a gentle nudge.

After all maybe the thing you need to get better at is giving the gentle nudges to people who miss part of the picture like me, and I am now giving you the gentle nudge to do so. And while comfort is not always easiest in the wake of a storm, I find that my faith and belief in God are most strengthened by these times of growth!

So, I guess I will conclude that I hope to no longer be comfortable!:)

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Life Doesn't Turn Out the Way We Plan

Growing up, I always thought that I was a terrible writer. I think much of our esteem as children is based purely on comparative means. I grew up with one sister and I always felt that I was not as good of a writer as she was. This was confirmed by teachers comments about our writing. Of course, this could be because Jenni is quite possibly the best writer on the planet.

There was a time when I began to think I might be decent. I won a writing contest in 4th grade. I began to develop a little pride, when my father and Stuart informed me that noone else entered and that much of my writing was crazy. I specifically remember a sentence I wrote that said, "The Master's Academy is far and away the best school I've ever been to." Obviously, as a ten year old, that isn't saying a whole lot.

Then when I graduated from graduate school, I got a job as the Curriculum Coordinator of Belhaven College. Then, I left there and became a writing consultant on several books for Kambuck Resources. And it hit me last night, as I was writing a review of a movie that three people will read, I actually kind of like writing.

Before you get bored with my writing of how I'm not a good writer, I guess it might be important to assert that many things are different than I thought. For example, after my senior year of high school, I never thought I would see a Bible Quiz again. And now, I travel the countryside doing events, while also assisting in local leagues.

I could list many other things, as several things are different than I thought they would be. This is something about which I am frequently in awe. As well as I think I know myself, it seems as if my prayers and pleas are frequently over-ridden and improved by God. Therefore, I find myself often thanking God for these "unanswered prayers"!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Who needs a Buck?

Yesterday, I had to renew my license plate for my cars. Now this is a funny procedure where you go stand in a line for about thirty minutes to pay a person an annual fee for the right to drive your car in the state of Florida for another year.

Now as I waited in line for the appointed period of time, then my number was called, and I went to the counter to pay my fee. I was told that I was unable to renew my plates because the Orange County Expressway Authority had put a hold on it. Now this was disconcerting to me, largely because I spent $25 several years ago so that I could drive through the toll plazas without stopping. And these devices have remained in my cars ever since.

After I asked what I could do to remedy this situation, they told me I needed to call the Authority. They didn't allow me to pay it there. They couldn't even give me an amount I owed, but they told me I could use their phone and have the Authority fax the removal of this restriction to their dedicated fax machine.

So, I call the Orange County Expressway Authority and wait on hold for about twenty three minutes. At which time I am told that I owe five dollars for tolls. However, since they can see that I do have a pass, they waive all fees and only charge me for my one dollar toll. Apparently, they also sent me two notices by mail that for some reason I never received.

Now the thing that makes this strange to me is that they took my one dollar fee over the phone by credit card. Therefore they pocketed less than the full dollar (to pay the credit card company). They had to pay the guy for the five minutes we spent on the phone together, than probably another five minutes to write the letter on their stationary and fax it. Now if he gets paid minimum wage, he made more than the dollar I paid in his hourly salary. Further, if you count the cost of the stationary, sending the fax, not to mention the two letters they sent me (that I didn't receive), they spent over a dollar on supplies. Not to mention the cost to the Driver's License center in having a dedicated fax and phone line, paper for the machine and the extra time where I had to return to the number cue.

So, to merely go in and renew my license plates took me over an hour and a half. As crazy as that time was, I guess I wonder why the Orange County Expressway Authority would go to the extreme of filing a block with the Seminole County License Plate Authority, which had to cost them time, energy, effort, and paperwork to collect a fee that didn't even cover the cost of collecting it? Wouldn't it have been smarter to just go back and charge my device that it was supposed to charge in the first place?

I guess the really needed a buck!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Who's a Good Friend?

"Show me who your friends are, and I'll show you who you are." This quote has long been credited to my late grandfather, and I have gleaned from its wisdom for years. I have done what I can to evaluate my friends from a neutral perspective to learn more about myself. I think it is very difficult to look at yourself honestly, so I have used this system for a shortcut.

If I've had all friends who are wired for just sports, I've determined that I care too much about sports, and I need to pull back. If I have friends who I find laborious to converse with, I figure I need to adjust that. Perhaps I have looked to change myself too much, but the reality is that I think my grandfather's wisdom has been an easier way than most to evaluate my life.

Further, a young man I was advising was given the advice by me to choose his friends more carefully, as people (and me) would think he was too vulgar, like his current friends. Turned out that his fine tuning of friends led to his elimination of me as a friend, and his life has fallen in the same manner as his friends. So, I feel like these words of wisdom are proven on many fronts.

Now, other than give props to my grandfather, you say I must have another reason to address this. And I guess it all started when I was giving my personal opinion of someone to my parents. I began by saying that the fact that he had no friends really told me something.

Within two days, I was counseling someone else who was wondering why they could not become friends with someone. And, I looked to the volume of that person's friends. I saw it as non-existent. While not the direct point my grandfather was making, I believe it is clear that someone with too few friends, really just is exposing himself as a generally bad friend.

My study of Proverbs 18 shows me how to be wise in acquiring friends. It culminated at the end with "A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly." Someone with no friends just is not friendly. And that is not the model we are given for friendship, but rather, the close of that verse reads, "and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother." (If you want to see some of my thoughts on this, click here).

So, my newest facet to look at is to see how many friends I have. I don't think it's a contest, but I can tell a lot about a person by the number of friends they keep. Someone who has no friends is doing something wrong. I have previously been someone to not keep friends. But I am determined that so far as it depends upon me, I will do my best to be a good friend to everyone I meet and befriend. I will do my best to be someone who is a worthy friend!

Friday, February 10, 2012

We Want Greatness for our Children!

My wife is at a women's retreat, which means that I need to watch the children this weekend. Clearly, I am less skilled at this task than my wife is, for so many unquantifiable reasons. Further, this feeling is exacerbated by the fact that I am less than completely healthy.

At any rate, as I am watching the children, I recognize that the world makes it so easy to pollute their minds early. My friend, Eddie Poole, recently wrote a blog on this concept. The world is quick in its attempt to degenerate our children. And it can be an easy path to go down, but we need to do all we can to protect our children from these inputs.

The problem, however, is that this blatant, overt attack only encompasses a portion of the things attacking our children. There is also the degradation of education, in general, which scares me. Last week, I listened to a lecture by Michael Sacasas about how our society is flattening the education process by turning the quest for wisdom into the quest for knowledge. Further, we tend to flatten knowledge by turning the quest into a quest for information.

Now you may claim that the attack on education is either unimportant or not a big deal. However, I think that it is. In a discussion with Marcus Mennenga recently, we talked about some of the things taught to our kids, even at church. He quibbled with a few songs that aren't teaching our children to be discerning. I think of people teaching my children only part of a Bible verse that strips it of all context.

For example, someone once taught children I Peter 5:7b, "He careth for you." First, I believe that this is a true concept. Psalm 40, in my opinion, fleshes this concept out. I am in favor of teaching this concept to our children. However, to teach them from this verse is like trying to teach someone how great American history is merely by looking at the topography of Detroit. You learn some of the greatness, to be sure, but you miss the big picture.

I Peter is about how to deal with life when it gets tough. The verse itself is within the context of proper leadership being not domineering, clothed in humility, and being watchful. In that context, we can look at the example of the chief Shepherd and how he provides a good example of leadership. The richness of the promise is even more exciting!

Now some may say that this is being too precise. Yet, I think this leads to a society of believers and leaders who do not live up to what they should. The book Why Johnny Can't Preach describes how this relaxed view of education leads to a subculture where we don't even know enough to hold our preachers accountable. And all of this just from my worrying about my kids, hoping that they don't have a terrible future.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Can you do it all?

Can you be anything you want to be? I think we've all heard it or said it to someone, and yet when I was driving Jacob to school yesterday, we heard someone on the radio say that it just isn't true. They further hypothesized that we should avoid saying it and especially avoid telling our children, lest they believe it.

I suppose it is true that our skills and abilities may be a natural selection of sorts. Despite my strivings as a young lad, I never did get close to becoming a professional basketball player. Despite my multiple attempts at being a radio/podcast host, there is no guarantee that anyone will ever hire me.

While my skill set may be a natural limiter and my son may eventually find something he is not great at, I am convinced that excellence is not merely attained by the talented. I do not believe that a lack of skill should ever preclude the attempt for achievement. I believe that a necessary function of the human plight is the attempt to become great at something that is fraught with difficulty.

I hope that I became the best short, fat, white basketball player I could. I hope that I never give my miniscule audience less than I can. I hope that Jacob never ceases to try at something he may not be great at. It may be true that we can't do anything we want for a living, but I believe what makes this country great is that we can ATTEMPT to do whatever we want. I think that striving for excellence is important.

People can vote for the best person for a particular political office even if that person has no chance to win. Equally jaded people may not accept that it is usually unwise to tell someone to give up on something. There is greatness that should be strived for, even when it is difficult. I, for one, believe that only working when you have natural talents eliminates that certain something that is derived from perseverance, and THAT is immeasurably important!

So while it may be true that Jacob can't do whatever he wants with his life, I hope he doesn't realize that until he's tried it with all his might. I hope he blazes a trail to become the best at something, even if his best is far short of the professional level. I will continue to tell him to attempt everything he wants, to value those opportunities, and to work as hard as he can. And if he works hard to achieve excellence in something for which he is not suited, I believe I will learn more about him than his failed venture, and that is what I want for him, as a father!

Monday, February 6, 2012

Do Cheaters ever Prosper?

Apparently Alberto Contador didn't really win the 2010 Tour de France. I know, I know, in other news my trash is now collected on a different day of the week. But I find this especially interesting when you look at the larger picture. Supposedly, Lance Armstrong may not have won any either, and we've already heard that Floyd Landis was a non-winner. So, what does it accomplish for a fringe sport when you declare that every memory fans have is actually not true?

I also feel that this subject cannot be adequately addressed, in my mind, without talking about the recently deceased Joe Paterno. He is the all time wins leader in college football in part because Bobby Bowden had wins taken away. The very next season, his school felt holding on to him was no longer in its best interest. Of course, we must state that any record today must be asterisked. Did Reggie Bush win a Heisman? Has John Calipari coached in the Final Four? Did Ben Johnson win a gold medal? Did Pete Rose have a good career?

The reason this is even talk-worthy is because it pits the two biggest attractions to sports in general. On one side, we have the integrity of the game. We value that integrity as we always want to think that what we're seeing is as fair as can be. On the other hand, we have our memories. If we could not remember what we saw, noone would watch sports!

So, when we put these interests against one another, we are all left with mixed emotions. This is one of the best days for sports pontification as it is the day after the Super Bowl and the game was pretty good. But immediately after a Patriot loss, I am reminded of the game that started it all-when the Patriots beat the Rams. Afterward we heard that Bill Belichick illegally taped the plays the Rams had pre-planned. While noone can be sure what effect this taping had on that game, the fact that the Rams gained 10 more yards per play on the "off script" plays than on the scripted plays certainly adds fuel to the fire of those against Bill Belichick.

The NFL decided, however, that they would honor our memories. As much as we may feel that Bill Belichick's reputation was build illegally or that the greatness of players like Mark Gastineau was through illegal substances or that Shawne Merriman should have been excluded from Rookie of the Year voting, they retain what they had. Rules may change going forward, but your memories are always true. On the other hand, college football has determined that the integrity of the game is paramount, as they have taken away wins, national championships, Heismans, and anything else they can get away with.

So, that necessitates the question, which is the better way to go? I still have memories of Reggie Bush dominating! I still remember Bobby Bowden doing some things. I still think of USC as the best college football team when they were. My memories of the college game are certainly not gone. And it just makes me think that these crazy asterisks in record books are laughable. By the same token, I do not think the NFL game seems less legitimate. The NFL will punish you going forward, as Belichick was fined and the Patriots lost draft picks. Yet the fact that 40 million people saw it and remember it is safely embedded in our memory.

Now, to the original point, what difference does it make that the Tour de France has or will disqualify Armstrong, Landis, Contador, and others after the fact? They are deceiving themselves if they think the memories of people will be dissuaded or altered by disqualifying someone afterward. And, I believe, they risk complete obscurity if people think that what they watch and/or pay attention to will be taken away down the road. So, I believe they should run tougher tests, kick people out when they catch them, and just let it be. Not trying to reward cheaters, just trying to keep a fantastic tradition to have SOME meaning.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Get ready for Super Bowl Saturday

I believe the Super Bowl could be played on a Tuesday night in my living room and end up being the top ranked show of the year (well, unless Kim Kardashian decides to convert to Christianity to be immediately followed by a marriage to Tim Tebow in a service where Oprah Winfrey and Katharine Hepburn are the bridesmaids and Tiger Woods and Tom Hanks are the groomsmen; Samuel L. Jackson would be in attendance as the production would be overseen by a committee of Spielberg, Cameron, and the ghost of Walt Disney; The ceremony would be performed by Rick Warren). Assuming that the far-fetched example I gave will not happen, the Super Bowl is safely entrenched as the number one show in America.

So, the Super Bowl only needs to consider internal factors to determine when to have it. First thing that the league will consider (though it would have no impact on the ratings) is the quality of the game. Having 13 days between games is essentially similar to 14. It is true that teams playing with only 6 days rest are not as sharp as teams on 7, so as long as there is an off week between the Conference Championship games (as there has been in all but 6 Super Bowls) the quality of the game would not be substantially harmed.

The next thing about which the league would worry is the ability of people to get to the game. Since most NFL games are on Sunday, it may seem logical that Sunday would be an easier day on which to host a game. If that logic were extrapolated, then the game would be at 1 PM, as that is when most of the games are played. Further, the Super Bowl is such a different crowd from a regular season game, that the normal tailgating flow and normal stadium personnel are replaced by an environment of a week-long party and three times the workers. People can get to a predetermined location for a Saturday evening in plenty of time. Even someone who works until quitting time on Friday, can catch a late flight and get to the stadium in plenty of time to enjoy the party Saturday before kickoff.

On the other hand, we've all been to parties that just last a little too long. Since sports radio shows relocate for an entire week, the Saturday seems like a crescendo and things are already winding down before the game starts Sunday evening. How much better would it be if the crescendo of Saturday led into the game, people were able to stick around just a little bit longer and Sunday could be the calming down period talking about the greatness of the game that has already happened? As I review my life (and I am confident that if you review yours it would be the same), I see that almost every big party or event I've been to is on a Saturday. It just makes more sense. Sunday being a day of rest for most people, it allows them to recover before getting back to the work week, while a Sunday evening does not.

Consider, that attendance and productivity has to be down on Monday, the day after the Super Bowl. Attendance is back up Tuesday, but the productivity of those who came Monday is dipping. It takes until at least Wednesday for everyone to recover, and probably the next week for productivity to return. On the contrary, a big event on Saturday allows everyone who doesn't work until Monday to be closer to full productivity. This is why historic boxing matches were always on Saturday night. This is why major events gear for a Saturday night. This is why Bon Jovi made a song entitled "Saturday Night." Saturday nights just work better with the flow of a traditional work week.

Lest you ask why the NFL cares about a traditional work week, the reality is that the different crowd for the Super Bowl is mostly corporate people. People who either make enough money to shell out and buy tickets or people who are important enough for their company to do so are not typically your third shift workers. The fact that corporate America does so much to make the Super Bowl what it is makes the push for a Saturday Super Bowl inevitable.

So while watching TV sitcoms reference their characters working at nearby Super Bowls, think that the dynamic of the Super Bowl may soon change. It is my belief that the Super Bowl should be on Saturday, not Sunday, and I think it is just a matter of time before it happens!

Thursday, February 2, 2012

I Wanna Be a Better Parent

Jerry Seinfeld notes that it is odd that our Statue of Liberty seeks out the "losers." The statue reads, "Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free; The wretched refuse of your teeming shore, Send these, the homeless, Tempest-tossed to me!" One of the great things about this country is that there is no respect of persons. Being born a peasant does not necessarily relegate you to such a situation throughout life.

That is a wonderful thing in so many respects. At the same time, you would think that maybe they should have said, "Give me your energetic, your rich, those who are able to lead, the tremendously talented are among those which, this land would be blessed to be ceded." Then we could revel in a country whose very existence was buttressed by a great people. But I digress.

The wonderful thing about America is we have taken these huddled masses (wretched refuse) and become the greatest country in the world. And the thing is everyone wants to leave a better life for their children. As a father, I want my kids to have a better life. Unfortunately, that often leads to the tension of my wanting to do things for them and wanting them to learn for themselves. You see, I have unfortunately learned that trying to make their lives easier now may lead to a more difficult life down the road.

As much as I want to protect them, I need to make my primary consideration that they grow to be the people that God has called them to be. In his book Front Porch Tales, Philip Gulley tells a story of a man who beat his tree with a newspaper each day. While that may seem a bit extreme, his tree developed deep roots. I want my children to grow these deep roots.

Unfortunately, mom and dad will not always be around to make sure the kids make the correct decision. I must hope that I raise them in such a way that they will be good, productive adults. And the exciting thing is that God thought that Kelly and I were the perfect people to do that for Jacob, Emily, and Julia! Fortunately for me I am years away from my children growing up, but a little every day they are getting bigger and more self-reliant.

Because my work in the Florida Quizzing Association and Smith Prep, I see a variety of parents who care about a variety of different things, some of which I think are wonderful ideas that I will attempt to emulate, while others are so strange, I want to call my sister to laugh about them. At any rate, there are as many different parenting styles as there are parents, and that is difficult. Because while everyone thinks they are the perfect parent with the perfect balance, they are all missing something obvious.

I have been told recently that my parenting skills are deficient, and while I can completely accept that in the theoretical realm, I struggle with it a little more in the actual realm. But in order for me to benefit from that (perhaps correct) critique, I need specifics. One thing I have learned is that I do not want to "lean on my own understanding." So, as much as I hate being criticized (just like the next guy), please let me know where my faults are. I am ready to learn!