'Til Death

Do we remember time frames or moments? Recently on Phineas and Ferb, I heard Phineas say that our eye-brain combination is the best camera ever invented. I am quite aware of the wonder of catching a moment and remembering it forever. There are pictures firmly imprinted on my brain that I will always recall. By the same token, there are many time frames in my life that I remember quite well.

Before I drift too far off the tracks, let me define time frames. I met Kelly in the 10th grade when she decided to come to my school (yeah, it was my school; not my attending the school she decided to come to). We really got to know each other when she needed my help in computer class. In our senior year, we became best friends. And the time frame between when she followed me to college (around August 1995) and December of 1995, we remained great friends and decided that we would participate in the Western culture activity of dating one another.

That is a big time frame. Specifically, it is the time frame where I learned I could not live without Kelly in the sense of moving forward. There have been many small steps and things learned in the interim, but the newest time frame of confirmation happened this last week. Kelly went to go visit my sister in Tallahassee so they could enjoy the opening of Chick-Fil-A together. That part of the plan was disastrous and to hear them tell it is quite an entertaining tale.

Being the selfish human I am, however, that part of the plan is of minimal concern to me. I was forced to pick the children up from school for ONE day. I had to get them to do their homework. I had to take care of dinner for two evenings. None of this went as smoothly as it should have. Last year when the girls left town, Jacob and I were able to batch it. And since neither of us care what we (or our hair) look like, we muddled through a week together. He and I were able to accomplish a few things together and make do.

However, when you add my Emily to the mix, the entire equation changes dramatically. First, she cares what she looks like. She even cares what Jacob and I look like, as we reflect on her. She also doesn't enjoy all you can eat wings or sports on TV. Further, I am now outnumbered and completely unable to concentrate on both children at the same time. In short, I am inept as the father of two. Nevermind the fact that Kelly is completely competent as the mother of three.

I am lost without her. As a man, it is hard to admit that I cannot do it all. It pains me to say that I can't make it happen, but the sad reality is that I think Emily is more capable of running a house than I am. My wife is an indescribable gift among a world full of talented women, but I just cannot comprehend how she does what she does. The song Mr. Mom comes to mind, but trust me when I tell you that Kelly's talents are far above anything that song can mention.

So, in the memory bank of life, the first week of September 2012 will always be the time frame where I realized my own incompetence. It is the time when I realized that without Kelly, there would be no me. Sure I might live and exist, but the human walking around would not have the rounded edges that I do (as sharp as I may still seem in some areas, I am rounding out). I can't make it without her and I am glad that I don't have to!